Friday, August 29, 2008

Trust God, but pray for rain

Focus on the family douchebag prays for rain

This is this first time I've ever done any kind of follow up to a previous blog, let alone consecutively, but recent events have prompted me to do so.

My last blog talked about how so-called believers in the almighty have little or no faith in their creator as demonstrated by the effort they make to intervene in what could be argued is God's plan. It's the next post down, so I needn't explain it again. I didn't realise that prior to my writing it, James Dobson of Focus on the Family had one of his cronies make a video calling for prayers for "abundant rain, torrential rain....flood advisory rain," in Denver on August 28th, the night Barack Obama was to accept (and now has) the Democratic nomination. As the final night of the convention was moved from an indoor arena to an outdoor football stadium, I suppose they saw this as an opportunity to silence his message.

As is turns out, it did NOT rain last night. No, it was a perfect evening and Obama was able to deliver his magnificent speech without a hitch. The speech was everything it needed to be riddled with solutions, quelling doubts and reaching out across the political divide and uniting. Very un-Christian sort of stuff, as you can see. So if Dobson believes in God's plan, and God "let" this invigorating speech happen, why would he have prayed against it? God's plan and prayers don't add up. A prayer is like saying "Yo God, your plan sucks balls. Can you do this instead?"

The lack of rain leaves a gazillion unanswered prayers. If this isn't God sending a message as to his "plan" I don't know what is. Dobson and cronies, don't you think this might be a SIGN FROM GOD that you should vote for Obama? I know, I know, it's only a message from God or part of his plan when it suits your agenda. Carry on.

But wait! There's talk of postponing the Republican convention, scheduled for next week as a full force hurricane is scheduled to hit the Gulf Coast. Nowhere near the convention itself, but it should coincide with it, stealing headlines and serving as an apt reminder of how skillfully the present administration handled Katrina. Now THAT'S a message from God I can get behind. Maybe this "God" fellow isn't so bad after all...oh, now I'm being like them.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

The faithess faithful

I was just reading the cover of a record entitled Ten Reasons Why Madalyn Murray O'Hair Must Be Stopped...and Ten Ways To Stop Her. I didn't know who Madalyn Murray O'Hair was, but according to the cover, she was an atheist attorney who sought for the removal of prayer and Bible reading in public schools. She succeeded, bless her heart, so this record is an effort by preacher, Bob Harrington to stop her atheist views being spread. While further reading has suggested she was a bit of a corrupt sicko, I'm still surprised Harrington was so scared of her.

Upon reading that record cover, it reminded me of a conversation my friend, a reasonable and loving Christian, had with his brother-in-law, a right wing, evangelical, hate-filled Christian. I presume hate-filled since the brother-in-law was delighting in the fact that on the November ballot there will a measure to annul the gay marriages which were recently allowed by the California Supreme Court. This dipshit brother-in-law had the narrow-mindedness to say that if the gays weren't stopped that the human race would die out. Yes, he really said that.

I must say I am baffled by the desire for any religious organisation to legislate their doctrine. How little faith can they have in their God that they think you need to legislate to save the human race? Do they think God is simply going to let the human race die out? If it does die out from butt-fucking and kooch slamming gaining so much popularity, then wouldn't it be safe to say that that's part of God's plan and those who do not succumb to the lure of Satan will be spared eternal torment and instead enjoy eternity at the right hand of the father?

God needs you to stop this abomination.

I've said for a long time, and as seen in the aforementioned examples, that I think often the most die hard believers haven't the faith they claim to have or think they have. They are scared to trust God, and not scared enough of God himself to follow his teachings. If they really believed in eternal damnation, there would be a clearer moral distinction between the actions of believers and non, but there isn't. Jesus taught of love and forgiveness, and these evangelical Christians are caught up in something very different. Proselytising and living behind a facade of what it means to be a good person does not a good person make. Playing along with this facade has resulted in a complete misplacement of values and love among Evangelicals in America who would rather support the pro-life, Bible bashing candidate who uses religion to win votes, while ignoring this same constituency on economic and social issues. These people distrust God so much, they are easily swayed into aligning themselves with the side that only pays lip service to moral interests, while completely ignoring the core of Jesus' message. As long as there is someone supporting prayer in school, they don't really care about the people who have no homes, food or health care. That is what legislation should be working to fix, not solving the woes of this apparently weak God who can't fend for himself and get his own shit done.

It use to irritate me, but now I laugh, when believers feel sorry for me and my lack of belief because it again just highlights their distrust in God. Examples like these also show how scared these people are. I'm not scared of the things they are scared of. I'm not scared of dying. I don't want to die, but I'm not scared of it. I'm scared of people I love dying, but I don't really care about myself (though I do fear any physical pain that may accompany the dying. No thanks.)

These people who fear the world will go gay or their kids will go gay show so little faith in themselves as parents (since they believe it's a choice) and in their God. They have no faith that God will shine his light, or whatever he's supposed to do to keep these kids on the right path. They don't have faith in their own abilities as parents, perhaps because they palm off too much responsibility onto God who they deep down don't have faith in. I think in their subconscious, these people know what I know. If you want to get things done, you need to do it yourself. I believe this and work toward this. If one is consumed by the idea that God is taking care of things, but deep down doesn't think he can, they end up making leaps of faith they don't believe in only to be left asking "Why?" when things don't work out. They seem to have as much faith in God to keep the world God loving and heterosexual as one would have handing over their taxes to a Taco Bell cashier who says she's good at maths. Instead, they no show no faith by legislating and protesting to get the job done. It shows as much faith God as if you hired an accountant from H & R Block to oversee what the Taco Bell employee was doing with your tax return. No faith at all. These people are intervening to make sure God does what he says he wants done.

I'm sorry, but I just can't believe I found a picture of a man and a Taco Bell employee holding something that looks like a cheque or government form.

If a family loses a someone through a tragedy like a car accident, or cancer, or anything, the loss is attributed to "God's will" or "God was teaching us a lesson." however when it comes to gays taking over the world, why are people not so trusting in God's plan then? Perhaps God knows there are too many people in this world and is trying to cull the population by creating less people who will procreate. Why are these people so distrustful of God's plan when the plan presents something scary like homosexuals or people who don't believe in God? I understand they probably justify these things as fighting Satan, but seriously, these people need to get over themselves! Do they really think they are more powerful than GOD? Of course they aren't if he is who they claim he is, so why the fuck does he need help from them? God will take of it...or will he?

It is a relief to point out that not all believers are like this. There are plenty of good Christians who will allow God's will to unfold as it should (or maybe they are just complacent, I don't know.) In the Saddleback forum which took place this past weekend in which Presidential candidates John McCain and Barack Obama fielded questions regarding how their beliefs factored into their candidacy, Obama had the following to say on the subject of gay marriage. While he opposes gay marriage (which greatly disappoints me), he also opposes an amendment to the constitution to ban it. Here's what he said:

"I think my faith is strong enough and my marriage is strong enough that I can afford those civil rights to others even if I have a different perspective or a different view." - Barack Obama on rights for same sex couples.

He seems to trust his God a lot more than the most outspoken "believers", and yet they don't buy into his style of Christianity.

It must really suck to be these people. They are scared of so much and the thing (God) that is supposed to protect them from such horrors, they don't even trust that he knows what he's doing. If they truly believe he has a master plan, they need to get out of everyone else's business and let God work his magic.

Don't sweat it! If the gays and non-believers get out of hand, he can do this in two shakes of a lamb's tail or less!

Thursday, August 07, 2008

Occasional innocence

It's always a treat to watch a movie again that you knew well as a kid and realise how much innuendo you missed, simply due to the fact that you just too young at the time to know the ways of the world and to grasp the debauchery before you. I somehow managed to believe, though I knew about sex, that in Teen Wolf, when Scott stays back after the theatre rehearsal and Pamela takes off her bra in front him that he kept his clothes on and all they did was kiss. The howl Principal Rusty Thorn hears from the parking lot was merely because Scott was happy to making out with Pamela. I saw it again a few years ago and at the moment of the howl thought "Oh! They were totally fucking and he just blew his load!"

Pamela Wells gets out her goodies for the lucky Scott, but they just kiss and that's it.

Another classic incident was from Ghostbusters when, while interviewing the librarian following her encounter with the free floating vapour in the basement, Venkman asks "Are you, Alice, menstruating right now?" However at the age of 7 and onward for several years after that, I heard it as (since I didn't know what menstruating was) "Are you Alice Menstrating, right now?" like that was her name and he was asking her if she was herself. When the other librarian asks "What's that got to do with it?" "Back off man. I'm a scientist." was the perfect answer because, duh, it was a perfectly valid question to ask if she was Alice Menstrating at that moment! She might have been possessed! Boy, what a revelation that gag was when I saw the movie again!

The offending librarian ghost who just scared the shit out of poor Alice Menstrating.

And then there was that scene in The Neverending Story where Atreyu's horse Artex appears to be sinking into Swamp of Sadness and DYING. Boy, how I cried, but I watched it again and clearly, he's just sinking down into another chamber to hold hot "counsel" with other horses and unicorns. Yeah, that's what's really happening in that scene. He's TOTALLY, 100% alive though. I was so naive...

I'm sure everyone can think of instances like these, but as we grow up, through constant exposure to sex and innuendo, most of us are desensitised and see the crude and sexual gags as they were intended. My sister saw Pretty Woman at age 11 and didn't know what Vivian did for a living but that's just not going to happen today. As for me, I became the the foul mouthed, perverted minded person I am now at quite a young age, but there have been a couple of incidents recently, which show a shred of naivety left in me. Rather than being embarrassed by these things going over my head, I'm going to embrace them.

A couple of years ago, there were posters posted around our neighbourhood for the LA Leather Festival. I didn't think much about it, until Gregg asked our friend Emma who was visiting, with a faux sex voice "Soooo, are you going to the LA leather festival?" and Emma said she might and snickered and I just thought nothing of this exchange. I was just against a leather festival from being a vegetarian and an avoider of leather. I'm not sure how it was revealed, but it soon came to be known that I thought the LA Leather Festival was some sort of celebration of leather and it's uses and would sport a wide selection of belts and handbags. Once I realised what, in one of the gayest pockets of LA, the festival was, I sure felt daft. Still, I appreciated that for once, my mind didn't go straight to the gutter as it usually does.

Which leather festival suits your needs?

The most recent incident occurred at a Supergrass/Foo Fighters show. Stephanie and I were waiting around to go backstage after the Supergrass set and I saw a guy with a t-shirt that I thought said "Put Willy Wonka In Your Chocolate Factory" and I just thought it was a cute, and funny suggestion to other chocolatiers to make their factories better by putting the master, Willy Wonka in charge. I expressed this to Stephanie and she just laughed at me and said something like "They are talking about putting his wiener in your butthole!" and I said "No way!" and defended it. She went on to say it said "Put MY Willy Wonka in your Chocolate Factory" but since a fold in the shirt or faulty contact lenses made it difficult to see, I missed the "my". (I swear I'd have gotten it if I'd seen that) I insisted it was a nice sentiment being corrupted by Stephanie's sick mind. I usually hold her sick mind in the highest regard, but in this instance, I was against it. Stephanie later relayed the exchange to Gaz from Supergrass to which he said "He's talking about his penis." I was starting to realise I'd lost this one and I went on to explain my error with the LA Leather Festival. Gaz said it was nice to be innocent sometimes (I just hope he didn't think I was always that daft since we'd just met) and provided he wasn't humouring me, I agree with that sentiment.

Here's the shirt. I was wrong. It says "MY" plain as day.