Thursday, June 08, 2006

My senior year at West Beverly...a tale of 90210 regression


When I stumbled upon episode 3 of 90210 on the Soap network after lunch one day, I expected it to be casual enjoyment of an old favourite. A favourite I moved on from 9 or 10 years ago. Or so I thought.

My fanship was serious in its day. I had dozens of magazines, collected 90210 trading cards, had a book on the show, a "biography" of Luke Perry, a 90210 bag and made a 90210 apron in my sewing class at school. I guess since a committed fan like me gave up on the show in 96 or 97, I thought this recent interest wasn't too serious.

For the first few days, it wasn't serious. Just catching it when we could, Gregg would watch too. A 90210 fan from 'the day' completely independent of my interest since he was in San Francisco in his 20s watching with a mixture of enjoyment and cynicism, and I was in my teens, in high school in Australia pining over Luke Perry. Two very different backgrounds of 90210 fandom, but now we're older with so many better things we could be doing, but instead we re-watch together with a joyous and shared cynical viewpoint.

After a few weeks, the casual nature of our viewing took a turn up (or down, depending on your perspective.) With the imminent shooting of David Silver's childhood friend, Scott Scanlon, we simply couldn't miss it. Episode guides were referenced. We weren't going to be home, so a DVD was set to record it. Boy was that episode lame. But boy, was it great. Brandon and Emily were thrown out of Scott's birthday party because Scott's mother busted them making out in a little brothers bedroom. What the fuck was the gang doing there? Thankfully the writers had enough sense to exclude Dylan from this ludicrous gathering. And just as well. Scott shot himself seconds after they all left. It was supposed to be an accident, but maybe in his subconscious, he wanted to die. I'm sure I would if the most popular kids in school walked out of my party, allowing me to realize I was never going to be a successful member society. We thought that was the big thing for a while, forgetting that this era leads us into the madness of Emily Valentine. The spiking of Brandon's drink with the love drug U4EA, and the eventual admittance to a mental hospital was on the horizon. We pressed on.

We still managed to keep the recording to specific events at West Beverly. A big concern was raised when the controversial, condoms in the school episode was on and I messed up the recording. At that point, we felt the loss of missing an episode and we have not missed one since.

And how could we? Donna was about to discover her mother having an affair at the hotel where she, David, Kelly and Brenda were stalking Color Me Badd! Steve had to go on the quest to find his real mother! But most importantly was Brenda lying to Jim and Cindy so she could go down to Baja with Dylan. Lordy, did the shit hit the fan then!

That has taken us through to the end of season 2, and we are now settled into season 3, which is HOTTT seeing some highly viewer-stimulating events which will carry us through for many weeks to come. Brandon dated a racist and now a sophomore TWO WHOLE YEARS younger than him. Brenda and Donna visited Paris where Brenda kissed someone else and started smoking. Jim and Cindy got a cabana at the beach club which is really annoying since today the announced they could only afford to send one kid to an expensive college. Lighten up on the cabanas, assholes! But I cant decide which issue is more important to me. Dylan and Kelly's summer romance during Brenda's absence which is driving Kelly cR@Zy (which in the 9 episodes so far, Brenda is yet to discover) or David's burgeoning music career. Steve has wormed his way in to manage David, who has thus far blown the minds of approximately 10 beach club members, including Mel (dad), Jackie (step mom), Kelly, Steve, Brandon and Andrea. Oh, and of course us lucky viewers at home! David is a master on the keyboards and hits straight to the heart with his strong and stellar vocals. I can only enjoy this plot line since I know his music career leads to little more than him getting crabs in a season or two after he cheats on Donna. Phew!

The scariest thing about all this is that while I am so cynical and able to involve myself in deep discussions with Gregg about what a moralistic and then hypocritical prick Brandon is, or how as cool as Dylan is, it is uncharacteristic for him to have anything in common with Steve, I still seem to have regressed feelings for Luke Perry. I certainly dont like that type any more, but when that Brenda is such a fucking BITCH all the time and he just so fucking cool and puts up with her FUCKING SHIT, I still feel residual angst watching them make out or hearing him say he loves her. Wake up Dylan! You deserve better! Of course he would kiss Kelly. He's dating BRENDA. She sucks. She's deformed with one eye lower than the other! What does that bitch think she's doing kissing that asshole in Paris? Her boyfriend is the brooding rebel, DYLAN McKAY whom every girl wants. Stupid, ungrateful BITCH!

I count the days until he ditches that hag for Kelly!!!


One of my favourite pictures of Luke.


The night Dylan took Brenda's virginity. Thankfully I missed this on recent re-runs.



Me with Luke and Monica Lewinsky when I thought I was over him...okay, I am. It's just Dylan I can't let go of.